Who are you, and what have you done with eastern Idaho high school football

Ok, yeah. I moved to Texas for a year. I chased the money and better football, where Division I-A recruits get a yawn and a shoulder shrug because they're a dime a dozen instead of continuous front page coverage because they're the once-in-a-lifetime kid. I admit it -- that was me.

But that didn't give everyone else in eastern Idaho the right to send the high school football scene straight to hell in a handbasket while I was gone.

Mitch Buck is at Bonneville? What? Who's running things in Rexburg (and from the looks of things, he is _running_ things, which is something 'ol Mitch never cared much for)? Hillcrest has a coach from California? Someone from California was willing to coach Hillcrest? Wait...... Hillcrest won a game? AGAINST A 5A STATE SEMIFINALIST?

What have you people done? When I left this happy hardly known state a little over a year ago, I left things very well in hand. Highland would make the state championship game every year. If a team from eastern Idaho won the 4A championship, it would Tom Harrison and Pocatello. Ditto for 2A and Firth.

In the one year I was gone, Highland lost in the first-round to a team in its own district. Not only was this a team Highland had beaten already, not just in the regular season but also in a Kansas City playoff, but it was a team from Idaho Falls. Highland sees teams from Idaho Falls on its playoff schedule and immediately starts reserving hotel rooms for the next round.

A team from eastern Idaho won the 4A title, sure, but it wasn't Poky. It was Blackfoot, who apparently finally realized that just because it's Poky doesn't mean you can't win. All you have to do is get out of the Dome and away from the Fifth District officials who love to make some interesting calls in favor of District 25 teams in the waning moments of tight playoff games. Anyone remember the Century/Blackfoot debacle from 2003?

And Firth... everyone wanted to run Bill Vasas out of town on a rail, even after winning two state championships, but here's one thing he never did -- lose to West Jefferson. Not that that's a bad thing -- WJ went on to beat.. someone.. for the 2A state championship. Sorry to say it, northern and western Idaho people, but down here in eastern-ville, the 2A squads don't really know who they beat in the actual state championship game. They just know who they had to go through in Districts 4, 5 and 6 to get there. Just make the title game, and winning it is usually a foregone conclusion.

At least Shelley kept things normal. It was an odd year on the calendar, so of course, Shelley won the 3A state title. Snake River, Fruitland, the IHSAA... doesn't matter who lines up against the Russets. If the year ends with 1, 3, 5, 7 or 9, Shelley will win the state championship. Which, unfortunately, bodes not all that well for Shelley this year.

Anyway, I'm home now. No more 18,000 fans at high school football games. No more dealing with TV crews at high school games (unless you're talking about this weekend's Rocky Mountain Rumble at Holt Arena, which could end up being four nationally-televised butt-whippings on Idaho teams by four middle-of-the-road California teams). No more 20 or 25 Division I-A recruits to worry about every year, and no more mythical USA Today national rankings to trifle with.

Just Friday night Idaho football. Hopefully, things will get back to normal around here.